I Need to Talk To Three Sets of People

1. People who brake turning right with a green arrow. It is your turn. You don't have to stop. Do you stop at a regular green light when you are going straight? No? So don't brake when you have a green arrow. A green arrow means it is now more your turn than ever before.

2. People who brake going through yellow lights. Is this a guilt brake? Are you feeling bad about running the yellow light? Are you going to come to a stop, back up, and wait at the red light? No? Okay then. Commit. COMMIT.

3. People who brake going uphill. You know what is the same as braking going uphill? Taking your foot off the gas. Don't be afraid. Be like the Little Engine That Could. Conquer that hill.

America!

I think we can all agree hitchhiking is not such a great idea, but I kinda love this. Australian Dan Ilic goes from Seattle to New York City hitching rides with kind strangers. It's a weird little snapshot of the beauty of America and all her assorted inhabitants. Stick around for the tag at the end.




(via Best Week Ever)

Driving in Middle Earth

We opted to rent a car and drive our way through New Zealand. This is hands-down what I would recommend for anyone going on a trip here, especially for a first time. The country is compact, so most driving distances between major highlights are easily done in a few hours. Plus, as Ben accurately put it, the scenery you pass is a destination in itself. There was literally not one moment (except if it was dark out) that you couldn't be happy and usually awed just looking out at the countryside flying by. In fact we took a lot of our photos either out the window of the moving vehicle, or by pulling over every five minutes at some insanely gorgeous lookout.

Ben used Google Maps when we got back to calculate the total travel distance. Including the ferry ride between islands (which we technically didn't drive) and the trip out to Milford (which we didn't drive ourselves but rode with our kayaking group), we went over 3000 kilometers! This equates to about 1900 miles, or the distance from Los Angeles to St. Louis. Either way you put it, we covered a lot of ground! Here's our trip map:


View Larger Map

Though we had a blast in our cheap little rental cars, a word of warning! Driving in New Zealand is not for the faint of heart... and probably also not for the easily-carsick-ed.

First of all, though major cities Auckland and Wellington have short sections of multi-lane interstates (motorways, as they call 'em) surrounding the urban area, almost all other "major" roads are little more than a two-lane country road. In fact, go but a little further off the beaten path and you'll quickly find yourself on a gravel lane!

Glenorchy

Then there's the driving on the other side of the road (from the other side of the car). This is actually pretty easy on the open road. In towns it just means double checking each time you make a turn! The most annoying part was that the blinkers and windshield wipers were on reverse sides of the steering wheel! Probably every single time I went to make a turn I first turned on the wipers.

But more challenging than the opposite-side stuff is the fact that a LOT of New Zealand is mountainous. So sometimes you're driving on straight roads beside the mountains.

Near Punakaiki, facing the Southern Alps

But a lot of times you're driving on curvy roads through the mountains.

Coromandel Peninsula

Sometimes really REALLY curvy roads.

Road to Queenstown from Wanaka

Also, New Zealand is crazy about the one-lane bridge. They'll put 'em anywhere! And sometimes they are long!


When you encounter a one-way bridge, you get a helpful "give-way" sign. A red arrow means your direction has to wait for oncoming traffic to clear. A black arrow in your direction means you have the right-of-way... or maybe in this country it is the left-of-way?!


Don't forget that New Zealand (like everywhere else except here) is on the metric system. This means you drive in kilometers not miles! On city roads the speed limit is almost always 50, which translates to about 30 mph. On the open road, the speed limit is almost always 100, which translates to about 60 mph. But you try going 100 kph on hairpin turns around the side of the mountain. Actually, don't. It's impossible.

There's lots of road construction so be sure to follow those signs too... like this one, where apparently you can choose your own speed.


So there's some challenges to driving in New Zealand. But it really was an amazing way to see the country. And the very best part? Even a wrong turn ends in reward.

The end of a wrong turn, somewhere in the North Island

Driving: It's Just Not That Hard (Part IV)

Okay. I haven't done these for a while because I got a lot of the stuff that annoys me most off my chest in parts one, two, and three of this series that I wrote in past entries. But today I was reminded of one more thing that people get wrong like 95% of the time and it just KILLS ME.

Here it is. In a nutshell. One sentence.

Flashing yellow traffic lights do NOT MEAN STOP.

In fact, they mean you have the right-of-way and you should NOT STOP. If they wanted you to stop, they would put flashing red lights. But that is what the cross street of the intersection has. If you see flashing yellow, it just means "Hey, heads up, lookout, because this is not functioning like a normal stoplight so you need to be aware and use caution." FOR THE LOVE OF MERCY IT DOESN'T MEAN STOP. This is a big deal because it makes the intersection unsafe when people who aren't supposed to stop do. Everyone gets (even more) confused and we all know that's no good.

Flashing red means stop, just like at a stop sign. It is at your own peril that you maneuver into the intersection and the crossing traffic is NOT required to stop for you and let you out.

I don't know if it is a problem around here because people genuinely don't know what it means, or if people feel like the polite thing to do is stop and let others out?! I mean, look at it this way. If there was no traffic light at all, you wouldn't feel obliged to make way for cross traffic. So don't do it now. This means, sorry flashing red people. Tough luck. You're on your own. Godspeed.

Now if all four sides have flashing red, that means you treat it just like a four way stop. Everyone stops and gives everyone else their proper turn, and right-of-way applies.

I made up a little rhyme to help everyone remember how it works. Just think of this the next time you approach an intersection with flashing traffic lights.

Flashing red, stop or you might be dead.
Flashing yellow, don't stop or I swear I will get out of my car and punch you.

Thanksgiving Weekend Recap

My Thanksgiving weekend was a little non-traditional. Since Ben's ability to take vacation time is somewhat limited, we decided to take advantage of a sure-thing-four-day-weekend and get out of town. Just the two of us. It was our first trip like that since our honeymoon three and a half years ago! So while we forfeited our typical trip home to St. Louis to see family, we tried to incorporate some of the Thanksgiving standards like food and football...

Thursday we left Nashville and headed east towards Asheville... you wouldn't believe the confusion that caused people when we told them about our trip, since those two words obviously sound a lot alike! We occupied ourselves during the drive by listening to all the songs on my iPod in alphabetical order. When we got bored with that (around letter D) we switched to listening to episodes of Arrested Development, which was quite entertaining.

We arrived after a twisting and turning drive through the mountains to our destination: the Inn on Mill Creek, a bed & breakfast in Black Mountain, NC. We would highly recommend it if you are interested in staying in that area! It was really secluded... so much so that instead of a street address we had to put the longitude/latitude coordinates into our GPS to get there! Dave & Brigette, the innkeepers, were really great and so helpful. Plus Dave's breakfasts were delicious!

That night we had a proper Thanksgiving dinner at another local B&B that has a restaurant. There was turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, green beans, carrots, pumpkin pie - the works. We definitely didn't miss out in the food department!

Over the next couple days we had fun exploring Black Mountain and Asheville. While in the area we visited the famous Biltmore Estate, the largest private home ever constructed in the United States. It was built in the late 1890s by heir to the Vanderbilt fortunes. It was interesting and beautiful, although crowded and a little touristy.
We had more fun taking silly pictures outside on the beautiful terrace as the sun was setting...
We had a fun day in Asheville after we finished at the Biltmore. We googled "best burger in Asheville" and were directed by our GPS way across town to a hole-in-the-wall joint called Burgermeister. No, really. We were a little skeptical as we wove through some sketchy looking parts of town, but we ended up in a neighborhood called West Asheville, full of funky shops and cool finds. And Burgermeister delivered. If you know me, you know I am not a big red meat girl. No real reason - I'm not offended by the eating of cows, but I just prefer chicken. But when you go to a place called Burgermeister and it is advertised as the best burger in town... well, you know what they say. When in Rome...

I swear to you after eating this delicious burger I could feel my body respond, thanking me profusely for the intake of iron. I felt stronger... I now had the strength of a grown human and a bit of cow. (Ahem, Dwight Schrute reference.)

After we rolled out of there and stopped at some of the shops, it was cold and icky and rainy and we decided to go see a movie. Ben oh-so-graciously accompanied me to see Twilight. I loved it even more the third (yes, third, don't judge me!) time around and to my surprise and delight Ben said he liked it too! Most of that can probably be contributed to the fact that he likes ME and is a good husband, but still. I'll take what I can get, and if he says he liked it then I'll believe him!

Saturday night we holed up in our room and watched the OU-OSU game. It was a nail-biter at times but my Sooners were victorious, winning 61-41. With their win, the three-way tie for the Big XII South was in place, and I had to wait until Sunday afternoon when the BCS standings were released to find out that OU was officially headed to the conference championship game to face Mizzou! I know a lot of people were disappointed in the way things turned out and believed that Texas earned the shot at the title by beating OU on neutral ground in the Red River game. Of course I disagree and would argue that OU's margin of victory in defeating ranked opponents is enough merit. But either way it is decided now and I am ecstatic that we will get our chance to win the Big XII and go to the National Championship game! Boomer Sooner!

As if all that wasn't enough excitement, we ended our Thanksgiving weekend by rushing back to Nashville through awful rain and traffic to get to the Ryman Auditorium in time to catch the Jason Mraz concert.

It was a fun show - very high energy and lots of crowd interaction. I was especially impressed with Lisa Hannigan, who was his opening act. She is an Irish musician probably best known for her vocals on many Damien Rice songs. She has a beautiful voice and played lots of interesting instruments in cool arrangements. But once again my concert experience was slightly marred by an annoying drunken person. This time it was a hippie dippy lush seated next to Ben... well, seated isn't the right term, considering she spent the entire concert dancing awkwardly and flailing around spilling beer on people. She also was trying to hang all over and sort-of flirt with Ben, for which I served her up a few dirty looks laced with the clear message of "Keep your damn drunken hands off my man." Ugh. Ben handled it nicely; he has lots of experience with that sort of person from his many stints at Bonarroo!

Anyway, aside from that it was a fun show and a great end to a rather nice holiday weekend!

And One Thing I Forgot

This morning as I drove to work I realized I had neglected one very, very important item that I love very, very much on my list yesterday. So consider this the 101st thing I like...

101. My car has seat warmers

Car seat warmers are the types of things that I have always considered frivolous and rather stupid. But all those thoughts go flying out the window on frigid November mornings when the warmth radiating out of the leather and all through my backside is maybe the most blissful part of my day. Plus, those seat warmers nursed me through months of excruciating back pain, like a toasty little heating pad form-fitted to my lumbar region. Mmmmmm.

So thank you, Toyota, for putting seat warmers in the design of your 2003 Highlanders. My butt is eternally, cozily grateful.

A Little Friday Randomness

Song that makes me drive like an insane person

I love driving on the highway to tobyMac's "The Slam." Especially in Ben's little Honda Fit. I can't help going crazy fast and weaving in and out of traffic like I'm in a movie car chase scene when that song comes on. Man! So I try not to listen to it very often, because I have a perfect driving record to maintain.

Color I am digging right now

I have purchased about 5 purple shirts and sweaters in the past few months. Just yesterday at Target I got this super deep indigo sweater. Love it. Next I would like to get some crazy adorable purple accessories... like headbands and gloves and some shoes.

Funnest Ads of the Season

I got the recent issue of Vanity Fair and it had a huge spread of Gap's adorable winter ads featuring a super random assortment of celebrities all bundled up in Gap's traditionally colorful sweaters and scarves. They have done a similar campaign for the past couple years and I love it. The ads are cute and funny and happy and warm and very Gap. The one with the SNL guys? Perfection. And, PS, Jason Sudekis is pretty good lookin'. Oh, and the one with Jason Bateman and his precious daughter? Too cute. And, PS, Jason Bateman is very good lookin'.

And, let's face it, these ads are doing their job. Because I haven't been in a Gap in years but this totally makes me want to go buy a scarf. Maybe they have a purple one.

Observations from a Long Drive

Yesterday I drove myself home from St. Louis to Nashville. It was a beautiful fall afternoon and I had a good six hours to myself. Well, Scruffy was in the car with me but he's not much for conversation. So I listened to all the music I wanted to and came up with some very random observations which I will share with you now.

***

1. Heartland
There is something really spectacular about rolling fields of wheat and corn and how it all glows and moves under fall sun and wind. Green and gold and brown, just folding out in squares across the landscape, dotted with a farm here, a little pond there...

When my sister was younger, she had this fascination with running in a field. Every time we passed an open pasture area she would sigh and say how she wished Dad would stop the car so she could just go run in that field. Yesterday, driving under an open sky of brilliant blue and through the beauty of the American Heartland, I totally know what she meant.

2. Airheads
I really love Airheads candy. This is odd because I am not a fan of fruity candies usually, and I don't really like taffy or anything like that. But I love Airheads. I could eat about a hundred red ones and still want more.


3. "Stand By Me," sung by Ben E. King
I decided after listening to it for the millionth time that "Stand By Me" is one of the greatest love songs ever. It is utterly simple - the words, the instrumentation, the structure. But good grief is it romantic - and even a little sexy, with the "bum, bum, ba-da bum bum" rhythm. Stand by me, no matter what else happens, and we'll be okay. Man, that's good stuff.

4. National Dead Deer Weekend?
I don't know what the deal was, but yesterday I saw probably - no exaggeration - more than 15 deer and/or partial deer carcasses lining the highway across my 300 mile drive. In my nearly eight years of driving back and forth between Nashville and STL I have never experienced this. One dead deer laying by the side of the road, unpleasant but it happens. But halves of deers and decapitated deers and bloody smears formerly known as deers... ugh. It got to be really gross and had me wondering what was going on with the deer population's sudden and tragic love affair with my particular stretch of highway?!

5. Vampire Weekend
I had Ben load their much-ballyhooed debut album up on my iPod and around Paducah decided to have a listen...

I give them an "A" for interesting instrumentation and a creative different sound. I give them a C- for how much I actually liked the album. I listened to at least 30-seconds of every track... unfortunately it was often because I could only stand 30 seconds at a time. After the hundredth repetition of a kooky staccato riff I just couldn't take it any more. I did like some of the string sections.

6. Cello
The cello is my all-time favorite instrument. It is so powerfully emotive - subtle, almost an undercurrent in many songs, but totally shouldering the weight of moving and feeling. Fun fact: my husband Ben played the cello for seven years growing up. Even now when he plays guitar he moves his fingers like he is playing the cello. But, despite the fact that it is my favorite thing, despite years of begging, he has never once played the cello for me. He claims he doesn't remember. I think he is a big fat mean liar.

7. How Did I Get to Be So Old
At the wedding I was in this weekend, we reminisced about how the couple had gone to the Homecoming dance together our freshman year of high school. I was stunned when someone mentioned, "Who would've thought eleven years ago we'd be here now celebrating their wedding." Woah woah woah. Do you mean to tell me it has been ELEVEN YEARS since I was a high school freshman?!!?! (Silent mental calculations...) But that means... I. Am. Old.

I thought about that for a good while in the car. Being a grown up. Shudder.

8. Names
I think it is cute when girls named Charlotte are called Charlie. I'm thinking of using it in a story I'm writing.

***

And that, my dear readers, is a glimpse into what I think about and do while on a solo six hour car ride. Fascinating, I know.

A Little Shaken Up

I usually like to keep this blog more upbeat, but every once in a while something happens that I just need to talk about... Today while I was driving to work I almost hit a man with my car, and it scared me horribly.

I was driving on a major road, and coming up to a large intersection (Nolensville and Old Hickory, for you Nashvillians). I moved to get into the right turn lane, which was wide open. The other two lanes in my direction were backed up waiting at the red light. I was zipping past them, totally within my boundaries, when from between two of the stopped cars darts a guy hustling across the street. He appeared and was almost instantly in my lane. I slammed on my brakes and screamed as my car screeched to a halt. This man literally had to jump out of my way and was so close my car must have brushed him; one step further and I would without a doubt have hit him, injured him, maybe even killed him.

I was shaking and crying so I pulled over after a few minutes to try and collect myself. I do NOT understand why someone would try to cross 6 lanes of traffic just a few yards from a busy intersection and not use the crosswalk! And he didn't even pause, didn't even look to see if there were cars coming down my lane. Even though if I had hit him I wouldn't have been at fault, realizing that I was so close to potentially seriously injuring or ending someone's life was terrifying. My mind was racing with the thought of what could have happened. What if I had glanced down to dig something out of my purse or change my CD? What is he had been jogging just a little faster? What if I had left my house 30 seconds earlier? What if what if what if...

But how good is our God, to place his hands in our lives, in the daily workings of our existence? To exist beyond and above our linear notions of time and our ideas about chance and fortitude. God is not playing a game of "what if." I believe that despite the seemingly incongruous ideas of His omniscience and our free will, God's plans are without flaw. I almost hit a man with my car today. Maybe I almost hit him so that the car behind me wouldn't actually hit him. Maybe I almost hit him so I'd be shaken up and more careful and deliberate about my driving habits. But I know there is a reason I didn't hit him, and at the same time a reason that I almost did. Thank you God, that today I didn't hit that man. I pray wherever he is that he is okay and that you have impressed upon his heart that it was more than just a chance occurance, just as you have revealed that to me.

RIGHT-of-way

Okay, this one has been a long time coming, and this morning as I sat at a stoplight and experienced this yet again, I decided I couldn't wait any more. So, I present to you this, the third in my series of blogs about driving. This one is about that mysterious circumstance, that elusive phrase... RIGHT-OF-WAY.

If you are one of the typical drivers I encounter on any given day, you have no idea what this phrase means. Or maybe you always thought people were saying "right away" or "write a way" or something else nonsensical. But no, the phrase is "Right-of-way" and it means pretty much what it sounds like - "right" gets the "way." Now this is not a slam on all my left-handed friends and family out there (what up Dad, Heather, Tim), but just a way of the world. Well, most of the world. Maybe in England they say "left-of-way?"

Understanding right-of-way comes in handy in many situations, but let's just reveal how it will help in two different scenarios, shall we?

SCENARIO ONE: Two Cars Arrive at a 4-way Stop-Sign at the Same Time

You pull up to a stop sign at the same time as another car... who goes first? Is it whoever can get their foot on the gas quickest? Or is it the person whose car cost more? Will this quickly disintegrate into a series of waves and points and confused halting? What if you both just sit there forever?

Have no fear! Right-of-way handily explains how to proceed. The person to the RIGHT gets the WAY! They go first, followed by the next person clockwise from there and so on and so forth. Unless all four cars arrived at the identical same time, or unless it is two cars facing, both of in which case someone just starts and it should proceed from there, right-of-way prevails.


SCENARIO TWO: A Green Light with No Arrow for Both Someone Turning Right and an Opposing Driver Turning Left

I can not TELL you how many people don't get this one. Okay. If you are driving, and you come to a stoplight, and it is green, and you need to turn right, guess what? YOU get to go! You are going RIGHT so you get the WAY. If you stop and look around frantically, this only encourages the other people in this scenario, the left turners.

And now I'm speaking to you, person turning left on green with no arrow. YOU are turning left, and as I've made clear, the term is RIGHT of WAY. So you must wait until there are no opposing cars turning right, or until you get an arrow.


POP QUIZ! In the following picture, all three cars arrived at the stop sign at the same time. Who goes first?

The answer is.... the YELLOW car! Followed by... the GREY car! Followed by the blue car! Does it matter if the blue car man is impatient and wants to go first? NO, because he doesn't have the right of way!

Questions? Confusions? Concerns you might be a violator of these rules? Leave 'em in the comments. Don't worry, I'll let you know.

Oh no she didn't

This past Sunday, a lady honked at me because she didn't yield as she was turning onto the street where I was driving, and I had to swerve to keep from plowing into her. For reals!

Hey lady, wherever you are - if you are turning right at a light onto a street where the speed limit is 50 mph, you best be yielding or you will get a face full of my Toyota Highlander! Especially if the lane you are turning into is ending and those cars will be busy merging. It is not my job to drive for you, no matter how loud you honk! Now pipe down and review the rules of merging in my handy-dandy blog from a few weeks ago.

Also, apologies to my own gender, but even though I didn't see for sure that it was a woman, I'd bet money on it. Men do a lot of ignorant things while driving, to be sure, but the sense of entitlement with which this driver pulled into traffic and the indignant staccato of the honking which followed definitely had a female air about it.

The rest of my weekend was great!

This is the second entry in my series entitled "Driving: It's Just Not That Hard." Today I will be covering the very challenging topic of MERGING.

Merging generally refers to a situation in which one lane of the road is ending, forcing cars in that lane to get over into another lane which is still open:

As you can see in the above diagram, an accident will happen unless one of these vehicles moves. Every day on my way to work I watch as morons... er, I mean "driving-challenged" people float from the on-ramp into traffic with nary a glance as to the cars forced to jerk violently out of their way to avoid being sideswiped.

Please read this carefully: THE PRIMARY RESPONSIBILITY OF MERGING SAFELY RESTS UPON THE MERGER, NOT THE OTHER CARS! It is your job to take the initiative to use your blinker, to slow down or speed up depending on the other vehicles around you, etc. It is NOT enough to doodle your way into traffic, expecting that other cars will part like the Red Sea in order to make room for you. It is also NOT acceptable to merely follow the right-hand white line as it guides you merrily into another lane.

Is it nice if other cars let you over? Yes. Should they make every effort to give merging traffic room to merge? Absolutely. Is it your God-given right to plow into their lane simply because you waited too long and ran out of room? HECK-to-the-NO.

All this talk brings me to another point involving merging, and pardon me if I seem fussy but this one is just completely dumb and dangerous to boot. When you are nearing a construction area and you see one of those ENORMOUS FLASHING SIGNS that says "RIGHT LANE ENDS 500 feet" here's an idea: get over NOW! Nothing makes me wish I was allowed to ram other cars off the road than when a blithering idiot comes barrelling down the ending lane attempting to swoop in and merge at the last possible second. I will never, ever, ever, ever, EVER let you over. If I see you coming in my rear-view mirror, I will in fact drift over to take up both lanes thus preventing you from going any further.

There is a verse in the Bible that says, "For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse." This is a beautiful verse about God's creation is enough to make humans understand and see that God exists.

I feel similarly about merging. "For since the construction workers and road designers put up signs - bright yellow and orange and sometimes flashing - and these can be seen by your own eyes and comprehended by your brain to mean that you must take some kind of action about merging, you are without excuse in taking said action as quickly and safely as possible.

The only thing someone who is a bad driver could possibly say is that "they didn't see _____" or "they didn't notice ______." There is a fancy phrase for that called "not paying attention," and from what I understand it doesn't hold up so well under a court of law.

DRIVING: IT'S JUST NOT THAT HARD

This will be the first in a series where I try to help people who seem to be bewildered and befuddled by the act of driving. Unfortunately, being a bad driver doesn't stop people from being ABLE to drive... sort of like being a bad parent.

If all this series of posts does is help me vent about the complete dolts whom I graciously share the road with each day, then that might be good enough.



Issue #1 - Turn Signals

With some skeptical exceptions, human beings are incapable of reading each other's minds. This can prove dangerous when operating a two-ton piece of machinery going 60 mph. You might be asking yourself, "How will someone know if I want to change lanes?" or "How will the person behind me know I'm not slowing down just to annoy them, but to turn?" Luckily, the makers of motor vehicles have, for the past several decades, installed in your car/truck/suv a special device designed to, in a way, convey your thoughts to other drivers. This magic tool is called the TURN SIGNAL.

The turn signal is a flashing yellow or red light that is located on both sides of your car's front and rear bumpers. By manipulating a lever near your steering wheel, you can illuminate either the right or left blinking lights. Inside your car you will hear a clicking sound to indicate that the lights are blinking appropriately. Once you have finished the act of turning or veering to the correct direction, flick the lever again and the blinking light will stop. This lets other drivers know you don't now intend to move in any other direction but forward.

Now I know you might be thinking to yourself right now, "But I KNOW where I am going... why do I need the turn signal again?" Please keep in mind, the turn signal is just that, a SIGNAL to other drivers. Short of rolling down your window and hollering about what your next move is, it is the best way to keep other drivers informed of your decision to fling your car into their lane.

So remember, I can't read your mind! If you use your signal, you are reducing your risk of me slamming on my brakes and screaming "What the ef are you doing you stupid moron" by at least 43%. And that is a good thing.

Thank you. The next entry in this series will cover MERGING, where I tell you how to increase your chances of me letting you over (hint: it involves your turn signal).