Tuesday, September 21, 2010

WHAAAAA?!?!!

Sweet Baby James,

Today I found out you were coming.

How it it possible!?! Well, obviously I know how it is possible, but still. How is it possible that you are just a speck but I'm already in love with you?

Your momma gets ahead of herself sometimes. Back to the story of how I found out I was pregnant with you.

I had been feeling kinda funny, but mostly just the usual kind that a girl feels every month. If you are a girl, I apologize in advance that you'll have to go through this. If you are a boy, I want you to understand that girls are very special and should be treated with lots of respect because we go through a lot for you guys!

But since I knew it was a possibility that I could be pregnant, I could NOT. STOP. THINKING ABOUT IT. I was wrestling with the idea because I know God is in control and I didn't want to display unbelief by worrying about something that was ultimately out of my hands. I was supposed to be getting ready for my women's Bible study and finally I just figured I would take the pregnancy test and then I wouldn't have to think about it anymore.

I had prayed for so long about how badly I wanted to be your momma. So I really hoped it would be positive. But I didn't actually expect it to be. So you can imagine my surprise when after about 15 seconds I was looking at this:



It's basically idiot proof, and the little plus sign there? That means positive. Positive means pregnant.

I started shaking. I started crying. I got down on my knees right there in the bathroom (where, by the way, I really need to vacuum) and just sobbed my gratitude to God. I'm pretty sure I told you I loved you a couple times, too.

Now I had to compose myself and go to Bible study, which I did, grinning like an idiot the entire time. On the way home I stopped and picked out a card for your dad from you. I signed it for you (hope you don't mind, but your arm buds haven't really formed yet) and then waited for him to get home.

And waited. And waited and waited and waited. Sometimes your dad works really late - but just so you know, he's doing it because he loves us so much and wants to take care of us. Also he does not have a great sense of time. Hopefully you won't inherit that...

Anyway, finally I couldn't wait any more and I went to sleep. You have been making me really sleepy even before I knew you were coming! I left the card on his pillow.

I am a light sleeper (hopefully you won't inherit that either) so I woke up when he came home. I pointed to the card and told him I got him something. He sat down and opened it. I think it took him a minute to get it. When he did, he came around to my side and we hugged and I cried some more. Happy tears, I promise!

So you'll be making your world debut around May 28th. And believe me when we say, we can't wait to meet you.


Love love love,

Momma

No comments: