Dear Kraft Company,
Hello. My name is Amy, and like any sane person, I really love your Macaroni and Cheese product. So simple to make. So delicious and cheesy. I'm not really ashamed to say that I can eat an entire box by myself in one sitting. In fact, would you believe I'm eating some right now as I type this? True story.
However, through 25 years of existence on this planet, several of those years spent preparing this meal for myself and the many assorted children I've babysat, I've come to realize that this product is seriously flawed. Tonight it got so bad I had to write this blog about it.
Kraft, I am begging you... could you please redesign the $#&!*@! box?!! If anyone is reading this right now and you have ever successfully opened a box of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese using the directions on the box, come forward right now and identify yourself. Leave me a comment with step by step detailed instructions about where the heck I am going wrong. Maybe include a drawing or diagram? Because every time my box ends up in mangled shreds of cardboard.
The box has a little area marked on the short edge at the top, a lovely golden crescent upon which, from what I can gather, I am to place by thumb and press in. And in theory, the perforated section pushes in and I can tear the box top off. Easy as pie, right? Or so you'd like me to BELIEVE, people of Kraft. But what happens, and someone back a crazy girl up here, is that the pressure of my thumb just crumples the corner of the box. I must resort to picking at the glued down flap on the top or bottom, which no doubt rips off leaving the second layer of cardboard securely glued shut.
Surely you WANT me to get to the delightful and delicious contents, so why must it be like breaking into Fort freakin' Knox to get into the box?! When I occasionally have to pry the box open with a steak knife, hasn't it gone too far?
All over the world, every day, people are opening boxes used to store food. Crackers, cookies, even other types of pasta and rice. And you know what? It's never that hard. So I beg of you, take it back to the drawing board. I can send you a couple suggestions if you'd like. I'm especially fond of those where you grab the tab and rrrrrrrrrip, off comes the little strip and you can just pop the box right open. But I mean, whatever works for you guys, Kraft.
Remember, I'm not asking you to change what's on the inside, Kraft. No, don't you lay a hand on that recipe - it's timeless and perfect. But seriously. SERIOUSLY. Fix. The. Box.
Thank you,
Amy J
PS to readers... am I insane? Or am I right? I mean, I'm a college-educated young professional... surely I am not the only one unable to open a box of Mac & Cheese!?! You know what, just don't answer that. :)
1 comment:
I am well aware of this problem. However, I have a very basic method for overcoming it- I use a butter knife, inserted along the perforated circle. One jab will usually make a cut big enough for me to push open with my thumbnail. And, it's efficient, because I use the butter knife anyway to cut the butter required during the sauce-making step. It does, however, feel a little primative to be stabbing the cardboard box with a dull knife. But mac and cheese is worth it! :)
BTW, I love the open-letter blog format, addressed to random corporations/individuals. Jennifer Eolin (the girl with the awesome Project Runway blog) writes this way a lot too. It cracks me up!
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